Dear Kitty Cats,
Please stop bringing me dead mice....and leaving them on the stoop. I know the economy is bad, and we don't have a lot of money however, we are not that bad off. I am not yet starving. We have plenty of perfectly acceptable food in the cupboards and the fridge. Furthermore, even though it is currently cold outside, the dirty sidewalk is not an appropriate location for food storage. I mean honestly, the dog pees there everyday! And the dirt and gunk that gets tracked through there is unthinkable. Also, I'm not even sure you like the taste of mice, seeing as how you very seldom eat them yourselves. And then when you do, you immediately come into the house and barf their little organs all over my floors. Or my table. Or.my.BED. This does not make the prospect of consuming them seem good at all. So, in summary, we are not poor enough to eat something that you left out in the dirt all night, especially if it is something that you yourselves seem to have such a hard time keeping down. And also, if you continue to bring me these so called "presents," I am going to insist that you marinate them properly and saute them in a little butter.
Love,
Crystal
P.S. The gifts I prefer are diamonds and pearls so if you could bring some of those home I would be much appreciative. <3
ewwwwww. Sarah's cat leaves them for her. He left one right outside their bedroom door and she thought it was a play mouse. She picked it up. It was not a play mouse. Blech.
ReplyDeleteThis winter they have been leaving them everywhere. The worst is when you only find a piece and then have to go searchin for the rest of it....
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